Let Me Savor This Pats

You have been a very, very bad boy Tom…

I just love how those words sound being typed on my little keyboard. Such a bad, bad boy!

Silly Tom, did you think you wouldn’t get caught taking the air out of those balls? The air out of your beloved balls. The balls with the long, white laces you like to caress with your long fingers. Especially that big one you like to…win…the football you like to win with.

As an unofficial honorary member of team gangrene, there’s nothing more satisfying than watching the Pattie Pat Pats, a) loose, or b) get into trouble.

I have this silly smile across my face, and no it’s not about my date last night. Cue Sinatra… I’m in heaven…. Tom Brady, I’m in heaven …Humming along to La Voz, as I pour a MacAllan 15 neat. Cheers to you silly men!

This precious moment brought to us by the deflate-gate scandal, may takeover the beauty of a Brady interception caused by Kansas City corner Sean Smith, earlier this season. Watching the Pats lose that night was satisfaction. De-lic-ious

Quoting Billy B in his opening statement to the media yesterday, “In my entire coaching career, I have never talked to any player or staff member about football air pressure,”

Really… Oh come now… Never… Ever?

Billy B, never is very bold statement. I realize you’re a bold guy, making bold moves in your hoodie and such. (giggle) As a man of your caliber, I would take an educated guess and state, especially after that little affair all of us remember, never is a word your mouth should instantly reject making the sounds of. Pop, lock, and hail-mary pass the key to that word far, far away.

Air pressure is a little valuable commodity. Especially when the primary object used, to move eleven men up and down the gridiron, and the object of the game, #winning, is dependent upon air pressure.

So when you and Tommy Boy have chit-chats, and I’m confident to state you probably know, since you like to channel your own Fifty Shades of Football, and the word controlling has your picture next to it in the dictionary, that YOU know Tom doesn’t really prefer his ball fully inflated. He likes it a little soft…

As Tommy B quoted back in 2011 on that scream-and-pound-your-chest-cuz-I’mma-Bawston-Broh radio station WEEI, and giving a nod to ProFootball Talk as the source, “I love that, because I like the deflated ball.”

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Oh Tom… Tom… Tommy Brady (shaking my finger) This Jets fan knows better. You’re charming ways don’t entrance this honey.

Off with this head! Just teasing… I still want to watch that pretty face get sacked.

You know I love sacks -wink-

I’m all in with Colin Cowherd on the ultimate Billy B and Tommy Boy punishment… Mandatory HBO Hard Knocks appearance for two seasons. I can hear the soft cry now. (giggle)

FFF

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Author: Football Femme

A football-loving, well-heeled Miss, who enjoys sipping her scotch whisky neat.

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