GILDED

I know what to show / And what to conceal No one ever died from wanting too much
The world is not enough -garbage 

Pattie Pat Pats… -sigh- you did it again…

Yes, this is obviously late dear hearts. I had to give myself a week to digest what exactly happened. I’ve watched the tale of the tape a few times, and realized I missed something quite special, while I was in someplace quite special.

Truth is not only was my heart in Paris my-self was too. I found a way with my pretty friend, to watch the first half up until halftime, when everyone went Gaga. Until that point, I wasn’t going Gaga. I thought, well maybe the Pats are done and my fantasy may come true.

I had to sleep. I had a train to catch the next AM to London. Europe doesn’t hold its schedule for a femme who loves her American games.

The texts I woke up to hours later were priceless…
“What a game!”
“Wow… just wow” 
“Boo… can’t believe that happened” 

I immediately tapped my apps to figure out just WTF (what the football) had just happened hours earlier. 

I was stunned… but not really. As a Jets fan, we know how those boys to the north find ways to win, and Coach Belichick has his own fifty shades of control drawn up for every team, tapping into his inner voyeur spying analyzing them.

Although the Hot-lanta Falcons were giving the Pats a taste of how fiery they were, I became concerned how their man to man D could continue playing as intense, as they had so far. Let’s face it dear hearts, you would be exhausted too if you had to chase around receivers x, y, z and the greatest QB of all time. Not an easy task, let alone the biggest game of your life that lasts longer, and is far more heavy than any of the other 16 games, and playoffs you’re already exhausted from playing.

Tommy boy proved my thinking to be right where it needed to be.

Enter Julian Eldelman, who’s not only my trainer’S BFF, he also catched that catch, bringing me to my knees and tears to my eyes. Paris heard me say “OOHHHH LA LA!!!”  That play was both glorious and hurtful.

The game was Magnifique!  Who needs the Mona Lisa or a Monet? This is football!

Could we stop what we’re doing this moment, to give Coach Sark a congratulatory clap for his quick comeback? Hollywood couldn’t have written a better script. From getting fired at USC, to battling alcoholism, Sark has been not only been an OC for Alabama, he’s now the newly appointed OC for the Falcons. Maybe Lame Kiffin should take a page from Sark’s book.

Looks like the offseason won’t be boring. Keep it coming gents.

Cheers,

x|o FFF

Not Lying Intentionally (NLI)

Dear hearts I have so much to share with you, my fingers are shaking with excitement! 

Are you ready for this weekend? SB LI is Sunday if you didn’t know. Yes the Patty Pats will be playing, along with their fearless leader, Hoodie Billy B.

Kind reminder to refrain from doing this during the game … He’s their fearless owner 

Be like this guy…. He’s lit and over 70 years old. Not quite the dirty bird, close enough. 

He’s also the Falcons owner in his spare time, since retiring from building the store you likely spend your Saturday improving your home at. 

Personally, I’d rather sit sixth row, wearing in my fur, channeling my inner Joe Namath at Met Life Stadium, while watching the heartbreaking Jets play, in front of me when I’m over 70. I’m optimistic over the next four decades… 

Who will win this lovely game? Watching the Pats lose a SB again is a nice little thrill. I prefer when Tommy Boy is upset. It’s not that easy to predict, and this game could be one of the best SB match ups to date. 

Let me guide you through a few points: 

Pattie Pats Pros

• Experience – been here, done this before with 4 trophies  
• Brady – arguably, sigh- one of the greatest QB’s of all-time will be starting
• Possibilities -Belichick +DC Patricia +OC McDaniels can draw up plays and game plans that make opponents have nightmares

Negatives

• Gronky – that tight end is out and he played a critical role 
• Overconfidence – they may want to throw it to the birds, and that wouldn’t be smart with this Hot-lanta team

Falcons Pros

• Offense – Fast + versatile with QB Ryan and primary target, J. Jones
• O-line – Solid protection to operate the show behind them
• Defense – A force and one who can fly into Brady 
• HC Quinn – the new coach pumped more than a little life into the team this season
• OC Shanahan Jr – he knows what to do with their system(s)

Falcons Negatives

• Inexperience  – 18 years since last SB appearance
• Defense –  young things Belichick can destroy quickly with his Tommy gun and additional offensive weapons – Edelman +receivers x, y, and z…

My prediction is a low-scoring affair, heavy on the D. That’s where both teams will need to focus since both offenses are potent.

If you are a pro-only type of football fan, the worst time of the year has possibly begun.

Unless you’re like me, who enjoys pro-style and college. 

Over the last 7-10 days, snaps, tweets and and many videos of recruits announcing to us silly fans, which school they will be signing off all their rights to as student athletes, tomorrow. 

The days of the hat swap in a high school gym, or an idea taken from The Decision have vanished. It’s okay dear heart to get a little excited. Now take a breath, and realize 2 -3 gents actually work out. It’s like picking a stock netting you a 35% gain. There’s not a science to it. Luck plays a heavy hand. 

Oh no… We’re witnessing another stadium finance disaster. How do you catch a billionaire? Or a millionaire trying to become a billionaire. Offer him several hundreds of millions in cash for a new stadium. Giggle if you didn’t see this coming…

These little snags happen. Ronnie Lott is running in to save the day, just like he used to when he played for the 49er’s. That’s domination in more than one way. Oh, San Diego is now also giving an offer… the residents will love that.

This is a lot to suddenly take in…

Cheers,

x|o FFF

ONE MORE TIME

The devil went down to Georgia / He was lookin’ for a soul soul to steal  – Charlie Daniels 

In my last update, I explained how greed is good for The League in LA, in a city where one team isn’t enough, and a round up of the divisional playoffs. 

I promise dear hearts, it wasn’t the unusual rainfall here in La-La land, or my (x) glass of Auchentoshan from the night before on the Sunset Strip, that I felt a little sleepy in the 2nd quarter of the Falcons / Packers Sunday…

This was a completely different game versus their other match up in October.

That was fun, this was a challenge…

I chanted Go Pack Go,  hopeful they would make it a game. The devil, or the Packers defense couldn’t quite capture Matty Ice on Sunday in Georgia, at the last game played in the Georgia Dome. Another football relic I won’t see, before the demolishing crew comes in with a wrecking ball…

We didn’t view much stealing from the Packers sideline, besides looks of sadness. There really aren’t juicy details to review what we watched dear hearts. It was clear, the Falcons #roseup and the Pack didn’t. Game over. 

The Patty Pat Pats are in the SB again…

New England demonstrated that with, or without their tight end, no problem. Enter their third string WR Chris Hogan. He used to be property of the Bills, and thank the football gods he didn’t play against the Jets. He pulled off the same numbers as Julio Jones (2 TDs for 180 Yards). Yes, the well-known Hot-lanta WR. 
The Steelers didn’t look organized. Saying the secondary played terrible is being quite kind. Terribly good is not what I meant. 

Six carries for 20 yards… Le-Vey-on-it, wasn’t on it. That’s exactly what she said here. No ball security and / or finding the end zone, or at least a first down. Cap it off with Big Ben is threatening to retire. 

Try not to giggle as much as I did over the following sentence: Johnny Manziel has announced to the world, he’s ready to grow up, sober up and return to The League.

Yes dear I have fantasies too, but these are quite some dreams Johnny has…

Johnny Football decides now he loves football? Let’s read between Johnny’s good intentions to find the unvarnished truth: a collector or five may be knock-knocking on Johnny’s door, and he needs to earn a paycheck quickly.  

He’s been invited to the newly minted NFL Spring League, or the USFL 2.0. The League knows we will likely watch a subtle hot mess. At least it’s football… In the Spring. 

In real news, Harbsy is taking his squad to Rome for a week in April. Of course educational experience was mentioned, this is a college football team. Don’t try to read into the details where this was announced just over a week before Not Lying Intentionally (NLI) Day, meaning every recruit in the nation’s ears just perked up, and if they didn’t, mine did. 

I know I shouldn’t but I do… want a Harbsy international scandal. Now it’s written, so maybe it will be done. If history likes to repeat, we know something is bound to happen. Although we already have enough with the current Viva America show that just started. 

Cheers,

x|o FFF

THE CHAMPAGNE CAMPAIGN

Looking like a damn football team / All in the same thing 
All repping one thing / Looking for Revenge -Drake 

Last post wasn’t about my New Year’s resolutions, instead how the Rose Bowl made me elicit every emotion possible. I was a little off about Clemson, and the only NFL wildcard game worth it’s time. 

How was that for you? I’m talking about last night… 

Dear neighbors, this season is almost over and maybe my screaming will subside. I can’t promise anything.

Let me take you through, as we witnessed Saban get Dabo’d, in the 2017 National Championship. Sorry Rose Bowl, this may have been as good as you were. 

It started a little dull, after several three and outs, a defensive battle on both sides, Hurts was living up to his name for the Clemson D. I thought here we go again… Boring Bama, minus their defense. One word describes Bama’s D… Explosive 

This game felt like it was lasting way too long, and then… 

~8:32 PM PST “Hell yes we have a game!” Oops… sometimes I can’t control myself. 

Deshaun Watson said he said he went HAM. We cannot disagree dear hearts, his stats prove it (36-of-56, 420 YDS, 3 TD; 1 RUSH TD). Clemson WR Mike Williams was in beast mode all game. Suddenly the Clemson offense opened up, with the D hitting bama hard. They kept it moving… all the way into the end zone, on a last-second play ! This is football! 

The Bama Bangs bowed their heads like it was Sunday. Let those tears roll. Congrats to Clemson – you did it! Rawr

Did you see that Bama cheerleader coach on the sideline? I’m a coach! I’m a coach! We get it. Quit waving your arms. Put them down. Cross them across your chest with a scowl on your face. Much better. 

I won’t discuss the ball-gate that occurred before this game. Remember what your mommas told you boys? Keep your hands to yourself.

Moving on to that pro life, some Giants were channeling their Lonely Island / T-Pain I‘m on a boat! in Miami, while Hoodie Billy B was keeping it real in Nantucket.

The Process associated with winning may not be sexy, but if you want to win, get comfortable with the uncomfortable. That means resisting the urge to Insta or tweet every little thing you do. It’s my gospel that the sin is in sharing, even when it’s too good not to. Keep the mystery alive.

Learn the habit of self-control.

Oh… I’m talking about a pro wide receiver. Never mind, you’re the only one exempt from my preaching. We need drama from you. We’re counting on NFL WR’s everywhere to continue end zone celebrations, wear those flashy cleats, pose on boats like it’s your rap album cover, and give yourselves outrageous names. I encourage all to channel their inner Ricky from Baller’s, so balance can remain in the NFL, and allow us to roll our eyes a little while giggling. 

After the Giants loss to the Packers, which shocking to no one, a Lambeau wall was the latest victim of The OBJ. Dear Goody Bear (Roger Goodell) let me purr in your ear this… Could you give one of those tents on the National Championship sideline to The OBJ? Us other NY football fans would thank you for it. 

A few key match ups this weekend toward the SB. 

I’m going to slap my little head if I have to hear about the Cowboys chances of winning the Super Bowl again. It’s called a fantasy. I experience them often.

Let’s keep calm until we see the Cowboys play the Packers this weekend. A-Rog showed us his gun on Sunday. Chances are likely it will be a high-scoring affair. Doesn’t it feel like the 90’s again?

One of these teams will be giving the other the bird, (I couldn’t help it) the Falcons / Seahawks on Sunday. Don’t overlook the Atlanta Falcons. They have been the dark bird of the NFL this season, not exactly the dirty bird they used to be, but have been playing fierce.

Seattle’s defense has been playing with a take-no-prisoners mentality, and say hello to their Bobby Wagner. Their ground game has taken a beating since Marshawn Lynch retired last season, leaving Wilson & Co to air out the offense. They have been using their TE Jimmy Graham a lot, which I like. He’s my favorite position. 

The S’hawks previous trips to the playoffs will be an asset. So will the ATL home crowd(ed) in the Georgia Dome for the other birds. Should be fun.  

Plan on the Pattie Pats, and the Chiefs to advance.

Cheers,

x|o FFF